Blog 15

I took this picture a few years ago when the ice storm hit our city and every thing was shut down. I feel shut down again. I did all the research and wrote most everything, but at the last minute I seized up again, and shut down. Plus I ended up getting the flu like terribly back over the last few days. Way to make a girl feel like she in a hole.

Blog 14

Free style

!!!!!!!!!Graphic images!!!!!!!!!!!   

 just wanted to do a blog about self harming in the form of cutting. While the picture above is not me for many years it is what my arms looked like as it is with so many cutters. Cutting is one of the most prevalent forms of self harm the a person with BPD does. It is also one of the most easiest to go back to. It gives the person immediate relief from a variety of life issues, but is terrible in the long run. Cutting especially in people with BPD can lead to increased suicidal behavior, and when in a group setting can lead to new cutters or relapsed cutters. I can not begin to tell you how hard it was for me to stop cutting, and for the first time in years this year I relapsed and cut. It is very important to spread knowledge about self harm and give teens safe alternatives such a writing and other encouraging practices to express themselves.

BE HEARD, LISTEN! 

RAW:

Just to give some one who has no idea how hard it is for a person in remission I like to compare cutting to a person who has a drinking problem. I can not begin to tell you how hard it is for a person with a cutting history to read a book with a detailed section on someone cutting with out fantasizing about previous experiences, or see a picture and feel nostalgic and fall back into the idea of cutting will just let it all go. 

Blog 13

What will I gain?

What do I hope to gain. Well lets be totally stripped down for a minute. I used to be very good at writing, and I used to enjoy it.... A LOT, but I grew up, and out of writing, and into terrible panic attacks. AND now writing gives me a tight chest and headaches and breathing problems. Every time I take this class ( 3 now) I have a major panic attack by the end and have to go to the hospital because my family thinks I’m having a heart attack. SO my main goal the main thing I want to take away, is peace of mind at the end. I need this class to graduate, and I hope to do so after spring semester assuming I pass this class. I really hope to take away the knowledge that I can get through something that makes me feel so terrible. I want to know that I can do it. I have to know I can do it. Because honestly at this point I am almost done with my undergrad ( 4 classes away from graduating), and I don’t for me see any real life relevance for this class for me. Yes I will be writing many more papers on my road to my doctorate, and yes every paper will give me more practice along the way, but MY main goal, like I said, is to pass this class and not end up curled up on the floor feeling like I’m gonna die.   

Blog 12

Here is another video form Keira. Here she is speaking at Yale. It does not include the slideshow that she was using, and I wish it did. But it is a great talk. I see so much of myself in her.

Keira video 2

Blog 11

{{{{!!!!!!UPDATE STATUS HERE!!!!!!}}}}

Sooo, Web analysis, oh you sneaky cheeky little thing. I though you would be so easy and you tricked me. I knew what web sites I have wanted to use for this sense we first talked about the assignment. While I was doing my research for my I-Search I found some amazing communities online. While doing my research I have found the BPD is something that is not very often talked about, now why that is I am not completely positive I feel like it is because there is no real one sure fire way to treat it, and for that reason it is taboo in the psychological community. But again as I was researching this topic I found loads of online communities of people with BPD and those who live with people with BPD. I found this to be a sad thing that people with this disorder had to resort to chatting online, but it makes for some good webpages to do an analysis on. 

Blog 10

Response to Graff and Birkenstein

So the first thing that comes to mind after reading this is the Dresden Dolls. Amanda Palmer is one of my favorite song writers and one of the most convoluted that I know. Her lyrics sound like they come from a paranoid schizophrenic with BPD, and because of this she is a hot topic in the lyrical world. People either think that she is a genius or crazy, and often times the people that support her want to and try to analyze her lyrics. But to their surprise they are mostly wrong. Amanda talks frequently about how her lyrics don’t mean what people to suspect them to, she sometimes seems frustrated while doing this, but she ( in a very sneaky stringing you along kinda way) She never tells you what they are really about.

Here is a link to one of her video’s. The lyrics to this song are some of her most talked about. 

Dresden Dolls - Half Jack

  

Blog 9

Process Update- Annotated Bib

Where am I at?

Well, I am know finished with my “first draft” of my annotated bib. I know from experience that it will inevitably change as I do more research for my research paper. I will gain many resources while I look further into the subject, and I will probably drop some of them that end up having nothing to do with my end topic. It is hard to stick with one topic as it seems when you research your information is constantly changing.

Also At this point I am still not 100% positive on the direction my paper. As I have been gathering information it has become apparent that there is not very much out there that is published that seems to be different. Most everything I read about BPD is concerning living with it, and the treatment option of Dialectical Behavior Theory. It is becoming increasingly more frustrating.